


a bad omen

by stellacecfair



Category: Compilation of Final Fantasy VII, Final Fantasy VII Remake (Video Game 2020)
Genre: Angst, Anxiety, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Final Fantasy VII Remake, Final Fantasy VII Remake Spoilers, Friendship, Guilt, Mental Health Issues, Obsessive-Compulsive, One Shot, Tragedy, biggs deserves representation
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-18
Updated: 2020-04-18
Packaged: 2021-02-23 00:34:19
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,889
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23569534
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/stellacecfair/pseuds/stellacecfair
Summary: The kids cry when he tells them he’s leaving. They look at him with something like betrayal in their eyes.“I’m always gonna visit,” Biggs promises, trying not to let his voice break as he looks around at them all. “You’ll definitely see me again, I promise you I’m not leaving for good. It’s just… I’ve found something I need to do, and it’s important. And… you might not see this now, but it’s for you kids.”
Relationships: Biggs & Wedge (Compilation of FFVII)
Comments: 6
Kudos: 50





	a bad omen

**Author's Note:**

> THERE WILL BE SPOILERS FOR THE FINAL FANTASY 7 REMAKE SO BE CAREFUL READING THIS 
> 
> this is messy af i fucking hate it
> 
> ummmmmm okeeee so 1) biggs is hot????? 2) he doesnt get nearly asm uch representation as jessie and wedge and this is S L A N D E R and not ok... he also has the sexiest voice actor... and also my Anxiety mind picked up little things about him that indicates that he too has Anxiety and so i decided to write a fic,,, in which biggs has anxiety. 
> 
> like thing where he thinks the chute going off course is a bad omen, and thinking of the worst case scenarios til his head hurts, and his cleanliness (i KNOW this is not the only facet of obsessive compulsive behaviour dont worry that trope drives me nuts too) idk i just decided to give some anxiety representation forgive me i have anxiety
> 
> i also headcanoned why he joined avalanche because fuck you game, you literally gave us a whole chapter revolving around jessie and not even one orphanage sidequest for biggs??? i think i know why but still it was annoying
> 
> also sorry but i use names of other final fantasy characters for the leaf house kids.

The kids cry when he tells them he’s leaving. They look at him with something like betrayal in their eyes.

“I’m always gonna visit,” Biggs promises, trying not to let his voice break as he looks around at them all. “You’ll definitely see me again, I promise you I’m not leaving for good. It’s just… I’ve found something I need to do, and it’s important. And… you might not see this now, but it’s for you kids.”

 _“AVALANCHE. It’s an organisation that’s trying to fight Shinra. To save the planet from their greed and corruption._ ”

“What is it?” Yuna demands. She puts her hands on her hips and squares up to him. “Tell us _why_ you’re leaving!”

The sight of her indignation almost makes him laugh, but pushes him closer to tears instead. How far she’s come. She'd once been so walled up it was a miracle whenever they heard a few words from her.

He’ll fucking miss these kids.

“I’ll be helping people,” he says. “I’m trying to help all of you. And that means I have to go to Sector 7. But that’s not far away from here at all! I’ll have plenty of time to visit.”

“But it’s not the same,” Selphie says tearfully. 

Biggs smiles, and gets down to his knees. The children all come closer automatically, even the ones who have been skulking in the back in their anger at him.

“My love for you all isn’t going to change just because I’m a bit further away,” he says. “ _I’m_ not gonna change just because I’m a bit further away. I’m always gonna fight for you kids, no matter what. You understand?”

There’s uncertainty in their gazes.

“Trust me,” Biggs says. “It’ll all be okay. It’ll work out in the end. You just have to believe in me, okay?”

They’re disapproving, they’re nervous, but they eventually seem to accept his words. He nearly collapses as they rush at him in a hug, but he takes the time to embrace them all individually. 

_He’s doing this for them. He’ll save the Planet so they can grow up in peace._

“You really are something,” Miss Folia says, when they finally file away from him towards their rooms. “They’re all heartbroken.”

“They’ll get over it soon,” Biggs tries to dismiss her. She shakes her head, looking at him sadly.

“It’s like you’ve always said. We’re a family. You’re so important to us,” she says. “I don’t know how I’m going to take over from you. You’ve left me with some huge shoes to fill.”

Biggs shakes his head. “Miss Folia, you’ve done an incredible job already. You’ll only get better at it. Just love these kids, and protect them, and be with them through the chaos. It’ll all be okay.”

“Where are you going, Biggs?” she asks him. “What is it you have to do?”

He smiles at her vaguely, turning around. “I’m gonna give them a better future."

***

Barret yells to the heavens and pounds his chest and often makes them all roll their eyes, but they know that he will do anything for their cause. That’s why they put their faith in him.

The larger AVALANCHE organisation has cast their cell out because they deemed them too extreme, but Biggs thinks that this is exactly what the world needs. Too long have things slowly corroded because of a lack of radical action. It’s time to step up and shake up the order that will end up crushing them.

He knows these people want the same things as him- change for the better. Barret has a tiny daughter who thinks he hands out fliers for the neighbourhood watch, Tifa has a desire to rise up against the corporation that destroyed her life, Jessie wants to save her father, and Wedge, sweet Wedge, he just wants everything to be okay.

“We’re drinkin’ for a better tomorrow!” Barret says in a hushed voice, as he slams a pint of beer against the table. Biggs knows he would shout to his heart’s content, but Marlene is asleep, so.

“I really think we can make a difference,” Jessie says, beaming. “I mean, if we carry this off, not only are we sticking it to those corrupt bastards, but we’re helping the Planet.”

Biggs raises his glass to that. He notices that Tifa seems rather uncertain as she does so too. 

He wonders. Sometimes it feels like they’re soaring, sometimes his thoughts come back to get him and he thinks that it’ll all end up in flames. He doesn’t dare voice this opinion aloud, because, well, who wants to be that guy? But his finger taps discreetly against the wood of the table as he laughs with the others.

He’s doing this for the kids. He doesn’t want them to come into the world with nothing and end up with nothing.

He’s always been afraid of the future, so he needs to protect them from it.

***

"Alright, so do we have all the gear we need?" Biggs says, pacing from one end of the basement to the other. Barret is letting loose on a punching bag and Jessie is watching TV- Wedge and Tifa are the only ones paying him proper attention. 

"We do," Tifa says gently. "I've triple-checked the supplies, we've definitely got everything."

Biggs nods. "Good. And we all know the-"

"Yes, Biggs, we all know the plan!" Jessie says, sprawling backwards and casting an incredulous look at Wedge, who shrugs. "Jeez, for someone who acts so chill, you're paranoid as hell, aren't you? It'll be fine! Plus, a bit of uncertainty ramps up the excitement, why plan our every step so meticulously?"

"Because some of us don't want to die! Or is it just me?" Biggs says. "We've gotta be airtight about this, Jessie, we're planning on bombing a mako reactor, not shoplifting a local store. That's why I've come up with five back-up plans, just in case things go wrong-"

" _Five?_ "

Wedge looks apologetic. "He was gonna make more, but I told him we didn't need them."

"And that, my friend, might be the difference between us living and dying," Biggs says, pointing a threatening finger at him. "Look, we're not exactly as well-equipped as HQ, things could easily go wrong-"

Barret grunts. "Someone get him to sit down. He's gonna explode if he keeps this up."

"We're _all_ gonna explode if you don't take this seriously-!"

A hand closes around his elbow. Biggs stops in the middle of his tirade and sees Tifa looking at him in concern.

"Why don't you sit down?" she suggests in a soft voice. "Take a breather. You're really stressing out over this."

"I'm _fine,_ " Biggs mutters. But when he registers everyone's raised eyebrows, he realises he's not exactly breathing properly, so he lets Tifa guide him over to the sofa where Wedge is sitting. His friend pulls him into an embrace. Biggs doesn't bother resisting, because Wedge gives _very_ comfortable hugs. 

Barret steps away from the punching bag with a sigh. "It's all gonna be okay, Biggsy. Trust me, Shinra ain't gonna know what's hit 'em. And now we got Tifa's ex-SOLDIER boy on our side, that's just more reason we're gonna win, ain't it?"

"I hope he's hot," Jessie sighs. "It'll be just like a damn movie..."

Tifa's cheek go rosy. Biggs gives a grumpy frown, tapping the wood of the table in front of him with his foot. He _is_ glad they have a former SOLDIER on their team, not for Jessie's reasons, but because their AVALANCHE cell isn't exactly comprised of professionals...

"Hey, can we get something to eat?" Wedge asks, after a moment of watching Biggs. 

"Hungry again? You ate just an hour ago!" Barret says, but Tifa stands up and smiles, thankfully understanding his cue.

"I'll rustle something up," she says. 

Wedge nudges Biggs. "Hey, bro, wanna play some darts upstairs while we wait?"

Biggs shrugs. He's not exactly good at the game, he's got the second lowest score on the scoreboard, but he supposes it'll take his mind off things.

***

“Hey, got a sec?”

Normally Cloud would say no to questions like these, but Biggs seems different from the others. Wedge genuinely believes that Cloud gives a shit about their plight, but Biggs has been relaxed and detached so far. He decides to lend an ear.

“You’re, uh… holding up pretty well, huh?” Biggs says, watching Cloud intensely. “Even after what we saw at the station and all over Sector 8?”

“I’m a SOLDIER,” Cloud says flatly. 

Biggs lets out a breathy chuckle, looking away from him and out through the window at the tunnel. “Well, my hands are still shaking.”

Cloud glances down and sees that indeed, his fists are trembling slightly by his sides.

“You get used to it,” he says, because you do. It’s easy to become desensitised to violence when you spend half your time swinging around a giant sword.

“Something to look forward to,” Biggs says with a faint, insincere smile. “Or... maybe not.”

He sighs, indicating that their little conversation is over. Cloud shrugs and moves on. 

***

_One, two, three, four. One, two, three, four. One, two three four._

He sweeps in this pattern, over and over again. Biggs knows the front of his house is clean, he doesn’t need the jovial reminder from his neighbours whenever they see him with his broomstick. It isn’t dirt he wants to clear- it’s the thoughts from his mind.

He cheered along with the others, and he knows they’re doing right by the world, but he can’t help but think of fire and blood and chaos. His mind switches to the children at the Leaf House dragging themselves through a dying world, and then to people crying in the streets because they’re afraid of the explosions, and then to Wedge and Jessie being crushed by the reactor because they can’t get out in time because everything went wrong and Shinra is out to get them-

_One, two, three, four. One, two, three, four. One, two, three, four._

“Cleaning again?” his fellow resident Jassu laughs when passing by. “Man, you live in the slums.”

“All the more reason to clean,” Biggs says with a smile. 

He stood in the shower for as long as he possibly could before the hot water ran out, scrubbing away the ashes until his skin was raw. And now he’s standing out here sweeping ( _onetwothreefouronetwothreefouronetwothreefour_ ), because if he doesn’t his thoughts will come true and he’ll end up dying.

***

“You don’t look so good,” Wedge says. “Did you get much sleep last night?”

They’re sitting on boxes, supposedly holding up the fort for the neighbourhood watch, but mostly just sitting around and talking. Both of them are exhausted from yesterday and aren’t up to fighting monsters today.

Wedge is surprisingly astute when it comes to reading Biggs’ emotions. It catches him off guard, because although Wedge often acts like he’s in another dimension, sometimes he can recognise things Biggs is sure he’s hidden well.

“I’m fine,” Biggs says. “That mission was just tiring as all hell. Thought for sure the explosion was gonna get us. My legs are _burning_ from all that running.”

“You’re tellin’ me,” Wedge sighs. “But hey, we did well, didn’t we? The mako reactor is destroyed. We’re closer to saving the planet.”

“You got that right.” It feels like a jinx when Wedge says it, though, so he taps out his pattern on a box next to him. 

He glances up in surprise as he feels a hand close over his wrist. 

“It'll be okay." Wedge smiles gently at him. "We can do this. You won't fail."

Biggs doesn’t know what to say.

The moment is broken by the arrival of Cloud and Tifa. Wedge releases his hand and beams at them- the ex-SOLDIER looks as disgruntled as ever as Tifa stands nervously beside him, clearly hoping he’ll loosen up. Biggs wants to tell her that it’s a pipe dream, but she’s always wished the best for everyone, so he just waves a hand and greets them amicably.

If there’s one thing Biggs admires about Cloud, it’s his apathy. The guy simply doesn’t care about anything. Cloud definitely isn’t the type to shake all over and gasp for air because his paranoia got the better of him.

Biggs wonders where he would be if he was like that. Fear has brought him to where he is now, fear of a dangerous and dark future. If he didn’t have that fear...

***

Neither Jessie or Wedge have the same knack with children that Biggs has. Jessie is a reckless influence, and Barret fears Wedge will let something slip about AVALANCHE, but Biggs is able to divert her thoughts from her daddy’s absence easily. He spent a lot of time doing that with the orphans of Leaf House.

They’re both sitting in the Seventh Heaven basement, Marlene on his lap making a crayon drawing of Barret, who’s out confirming when the next mission can take place. Tifa is serving customers upstairs, Wedge is helping Gwen of the Watch with something or another and Jessie is… what _is_ Jessie doing?

“I like kitties a lot, but I also think doggies are super cool,” Marlene informs him. It appears that she’s drawing her father walking Stamp the dog, which Biggs knows will probably kill Barret. “They’re always so happy, and they follow you everywhere. Betty’s cats always run away.”

“Biggums, Reggie and Smalls always _scratch_ me,” Biggs tells her ruefully. “Cats aren’t mean, though, you just need to take time to get to know them. It’s like your Daddy, right? People sometimes find him scary, but you and I know he’s the biggest softie ever.”

“Daddy’s never scary!” Marlene says. “Those people are silly.”

Biggs chuckles. “They are. _And_ you’re super brave, too.”

Marlene giggles, and leans across the table to grab a crayon that’s rolled out of reach. Biggs gets it for her and lightly bops her nose with it.

She knows so little. At Leaf House there were some kids who were full of confusion, not understanding what had happened to them, but there were also those who were so palpably aware of the consequences of the world. Biggs’ heart has always ached for those children- they had burdens on their shoulders far beyond their years and already knew that bad things were out of their control. 

Biggs always tried to make them feel safe, he tried to help them up and remind them that they weren’t alone, and could share the weight together. But he himself feels completely at the mercy of the world, and he doesn’t know if he can escape its control. Every possible outcome eats at him, everything feels like a bad omen because it _is-_

No. That isn't why he's fighting. He's fighting to change things. He _does_ have the power to change it.

He has to believe it.

***

Their parachute lands way too far out. Jessie is still full of giggles from the exhilaration of soaring up high, but Biggs frowns as he looks around- they're quite a bit off from Sector 7.

"Hey, how come we ended up out here?" he asks, as they remove the parachute. "We're way off..."

Jessie shrugs. "Maybe it was something with the wind. Who cares? That was _awesome!_ "

Biggs hums vaguely. He's not been thinking for the past few hours, by virtue of the fact he's been heavily under attack by Shinra soldiers and Sweepers, but now they're here and the adrenaline has faded he starts to feel worried again. 

_What if it's a sign?_ he thinks, looking around him. He rubs the side of his head- _one, two, three, four. One, two, three, four. One, two, three, four._

"Come on, Biggs!" Jessie calls. "What's up with you? Let's get back?!

"Y-Yeah," Biggs says. He drags his feet along for a moment, before picking up the pace. "Hey, Jessie?"

"Yeah?" she says, hopping and skipping along, clearly still on a massive high. 

"You think everything will be alright tomorrow?" he says carefully. 

Jessie gives a huge, exaggerated sigh that's almost offensive. "It'll be _fine._ We've got the weaker blaster agent, we've got your five plans... If only we had Cloud... maybe you're right, without him, it might end up in flames after all..."

"Don't!"

"I was _joking,_ you big baby. We'll be okay." She smiles at him. "I've just gotta fix up the bomb. There should be a much smaller reaction than last time. The only people that'll get hurt are Shinra."

 _One, two, three, four. One, two, three, four. One, two, three, four._ "I hope you're right."

"'Course I am. I am the mastermind behind our group, after all!" she sings. "Oh, I sure hope Cloud comes around to mine quickly... Do I have some plans for him..."

"Keep the details to yourself!"

"Get your mind out of the gutter, I was gonna give him Barrier materia and invite him over for pizza!" she chastises him.

"Oh. Sorry."

"And then hopefully I'll get a ride better than that motorcycle-"

" _Give it a rest!_ "

***

It's getting harder and harder to insist that this is all about the money, for Cloud, and it's beginning to annoy him. The look in sheer delight in Wedge's eyes when he offers to walk with him almost tempts him to say, _hey, I'm only walking with you because I have to get to places, too,_ but he restrains himself.

Wedge is determined to check on the other two, and so Cloud follows him. He's half-curious to see where the other Avalanche members live.

"Looks like Biggs hasn't made it home, yet," Wedge says, when they stop outside another small house. 

"Guess not," Cloud says. He notes that although they're still surrounded by the squalor of the Sector 7 slums, this house seems much cleaner from the outside than the others, almost meticulously so. "I'm sure he's fine."

"Hope he isn't worse-caseing it again," Wedge sighs, looking concerned. "He's got a habit of overthinking things. Worrying about all the possible outcomes till his head hurts."

Cloud thinks of the cheerful Biggs he's seen so far, and can't imagine him being stressed over much. "Wouldn't have guessed it."

"He acts all cool, but..." Wedge hums contemplatively. "When he worries, I worry."

Cloud wonders if being a terrorist is the right profession for an overthinker- it tends to be quite a stressful job.

"C'mon, let's go to Jessie's!" Wedge says, interrupting his thoughts. Cloud shrugs and follows him.

***

Biggs smiles at Cloud as he approaches. He's methodically sweeping the steps outside of his tiny home- it doesn't look like there's much to clean. 

"Hi, Cloud. Survived the jump, then?" he says jovially. "How's- how's Wedge?"

Cloud detects a slight waver in his voice, notes the tension in the other man's shoulders. "He's fine. I dropped him off home."

Relief shows on Biggs' face.

"Well, that's good to hear," he says quietly. "Tomorrow's a really big day for all of us. When Wedge said he got shot, I was afraid we'd have to call off the whole damn thing."

"It'll be fine."

"Heading topside in secret... Don't think I could have faced Barret if something had happened." Biggs starts to pace, tapping the end of his broomstick. "But Jessie'd been acting weird and I knew I couldn't just ignore her-"

"Biggs." Cloud is starting to understand what Wedge was talking about.

Biggs doesn't seem to hear him. "She must be prepping the bomb right now. But will she be able to finish before morning? I should go and see if she needs any-"

"Biggs!" Cloud says more insistently, as Biggs makes to leave. A look of surprise crosses Biggs' face.

"Huh?" he says, slightly breathlessly. He looks down at his hands and notices that they're trembling. He tightens his grip on the broomstick, tapping again. "... Sorry. Our chute was blown pretty far off course. It felt like a bad omen or something, so..."

Cloud notices that there's a pattern to Biggs' incessant tapping. _One, two, three, four. One, two, three, four. One, two, three, four._

"Get some rest," Cloud advises him. He can only imagine how much further Biggs can spiral. "You need it."

"Roger." Biggs jerks his head, looking uncomfortable. Tap, tap, tap, tap. 

"Night," Cloud says. "Take it easy."

Biggs swallows. "Night. And thanks, really."

Cloud nods at him and departs. He stops some way and turns his head to look back. Biggs is still sweeping, in that same pattern as before.

***

It's way too quiet for Biggs' taste. He knows he shouldn't _want_ there to be soldiers patrolling to catch him out and fight him, but it's unnerving being stuck with his thoughts.

The fact that it's been so easy to secure the group's path into the reactor bothers him too. He knows it's because the group have caused chaos topside, but his mind wanders and creates other possible scenarios, like the fact that this could be a trap and Shinra are waiting to launch an attack against them-

 _Stop it, Biggs,_ he thinks, lightly punching himself in the temple. Twelve times. _Shut your brain up and wait patiently for them to come. Don't think._

He decides to distract himself by doing push-ups, but ends up having to pause to count out his pattern because he can't stop his fucking brain. He switches to trying a plank, because that shit hurts so much the only thing you can think of is the pain, and then he tries squats, and then he settles for banging his head against the wall, because what is _taking_ them so long?

Could one of them be injured? For the love of fuck, if that's the case, he might just lose his mind. After escaping the motorcycle chase and the Shinra mech attacks, if one of them really got injured on the way to the reactor...

"Shut up!" he tells himself. "They're fine!" 

He sits cross-legged, thinking of trying meditation. Tifa has often reccomended it to him, because of some shit to do with chakras and inner peace, but he's always been dreadful at it because he cannot for the life of him clear his mind.

But, well, it's not like he has anything else to do. He settles his elbows against his knees, pinches his fingers together, and closes his eyes, inhaling deeply.

The image of an injured Wedge being dragged along the train-tracks flashes in his mind.

"Okay, that's enough meditation," he says, standing up at once. _Fuck._

Maybe this wasn't the best job for him. He's not a pussy, though, he can put up with it.

He doesn't have to wait much longer to escape his torture, though. He hears the sound of advancing footsteps and creeps towards the door, getting into position, one hand lingering around his gun. He can't hear any chatter, he assumes it can't be the group-

He grunts in shock as a giant blade swing towards his throat. His hands jump in the air and he squeezes his eyes shut. "Mercy!"

At the lack of response, he opens one eye. Both of them widen as he sees his assailant. 

"Wait- _Cloud?_ " he says, as Cloud sighs and sheathes his sword again. "Where's Jessie and Wedge?"

"Report," Barret says, stepping towards Biggs.

Biggs regards him suspiciously. _Why isn't he answering the question?_ "Topside's going nuts after some terrorists jumped off a train. Nice and quiet here, though. So quiet I had no trouble securing your route into the reactor."

A huge grin spreads across Barret's face. "You magnificent son of a bitch, bring it in!"

His arms fling outwards and he dives towards Biggs for a celebratory hug. Biggs, well-practised at avoiding Barret's flailing arms, ducks the embrace and turns to Cloud and Tifa.

"So, where are the others?" he asks, at the same time Barret says, "C'mon, man..."

Hesitation shows in Tifa's expression. She casts a half glance at Barret, before murmuring, "Jessie got hurt, and couldn't make it."

Instantly, Biggs' stomach swoops. "Bad?"

"Not so bad she couldn't rope in this guy," Barret says quickly, recognising the expression on Biggs' face. "It's just a minor blow. Nothing she can't handle."

The sickening roiling of Biggs' stomach eases slightly, and he turns to Cloud. "... Thanks for stepping up."

"It's a job," Cloud says, just as apathetic as ever. Biggs snorts.

"Worked out pretty good, you picking that train you did," he says, his wariness about Jessie dissipating completely as he sees that the others aren't in distress- so she must be okay. "While Shinra scours Sector 4... you can waltz right on into Sector 5."

He pats the entrance flap. "It's a bit of a squeeze, but it ought to get you to where you need to go."

"Little dark and foreboding for my taste..." Barret says, wrinkling his nose.

"Beggars can't be choosers."

He can't help but feel relieved as he hands them their equipment and swings away with his own grappling gun. Usually he would lose his mind at a teammate being lost just before a mission, but Cloud is here, and he basically counts for two of them, so... maybe things are working out. Maybe this is a good sign for once.

***

"Biggs is one of a kind."

Cloud's eyebrows leave his face- _Biggs?_ The mention of his name catches him completely off guard, because he never expected his weapons-savvy fellow terrorist to have been an _orphanage teacher_ of all things. What in the name of the Planet could have inspired such a change?

Miss Folia doesn't enlighten him. She looks fondly reminiscient for a second, before shock crosses her face.

"Oh, my, I'm late! I gotta get going!" she says. "Thanks again for finding the kids!"

She runs back into the house. Aerith smiles as she leaves and turns to Cloud. "That was so sweet. I really hope things work out for her and the kids. They don't get a lot of donations, but... They're tough, the Leaf House kids."

"Hm." Cloud frowns. "She mentioned that the last teacher was called Biggs. Did you know him?"

"Biggs? Yeah, I know him! The kids love him, like Miss Folia said, he used to be the teacher here. He visits sometimes, and donates a lot," Aerith says. "He's super nice. I don't know why he left Sector 5, though. There were rumours..."

Aerith hesitates.

"What?" Cloud asks.

"There were rumours he joined AVALANCHE," she says tentatively. "I heard it around... But nobody knows for sure. Nobody wants to believe it. I can't imagine an orphanage teacher becoming an eco-terrorist, can you?"

She gives Cloud a shrewd look, and return he gives a hard shrug, though his mind is ticking. So it _is_ the same Biggs.

"Do you know him?" Aerith asks curiously.

Cloud hums vaguely. "Not really. I've heard of him."

"Mysterious," Aerith giggles. "Merc connections, huh?"

Cloud doesn't respond.

Aerith looks around at the kids playing outside. "If he did join AVALANCHE, maybe it would have been to protect the children. They want to make the Planet a better place, right? Maybe he wanted to do that for them."

The thought, for some reason, makes Cloud's chest twinge. He jerks his head to clear his mind and walks away.

***

Wedge takes one look out of the window and lets out a horrified gasp.

"Guys... it's Shinra!" he says. Helicopters are circling above Sector 7, emblazoned with that goddamn fucking logo, and are advancing towards the pillar. "What the hell are they doing here?"

"Shinra?" Barret demands, barging towards the window. His teeth grind at the sight of the approaching aircraft. "Shit! Shit! Son of a fucking bitch!"

Marlene gapes at her father. Biggs closes his hands over her ears.

"We gotta move," he urges- people outside are already sprinting, armed and bursting to fight. "Goddamn it- they're coming for us because of Reactor 5, aren't they?"

The door to Seventh Heaven bursts open and Jessie dashes inside. "They're heading for the pillar! The watch is already on the move! Let's hit 'em where it hurts!"

"Alright, c'mon, c'mon, let's go, let's go, let's go!" Barret roars. He turns to his daughter, who's wide-eyed and trembling slightly at the sight of all the tumult. "Marlene, baby, I need you to do something for me. Can you hide here? Can you hide underneath the counter, sweetheart?"

"Daddy..." Marlene says in a shaky voice. "Daddy, what's happening?" 

"Something bad's happening, and Daddy needs to go fix it," Barret says in a pained voice. "I just need you to hide for me, baby, okay? Make sure you don't move from here."

Though she looks terrified, she nods. Barret swoops in and kisses her, Biggs gives her a hasty pat on the head and the rest of them head out into the streets, swarmed by terrified civilians and a furious resistance.

" _AVALANCHE! WATCH! WITH ME!"_ Barret bellows.

The gunfire begins. A voice echoes throughout the slums- " _AVALANCHE, stand down!_ "

"Like _hell_ we will!" Biggs yells. _It won't end like this._

***

Except it will. Biggs faces the Shinra troops flooding the Sector and he knows that the bad omens have come true. 

He shoots at the soldiers before they can get to him and Wedge. He can see that Wedge is seconds away from a full-blown panic, but he's still gunning valiantly. He's so brave. He's always tried so hard.

Memories flood his mind. He thinks of Wedge crouching by his cats, of being wrapped in his arms after particularly long panic attacks, being reassured that it’ll all be okay. Wedge has always wanted everything to be okay.

Biggs will make it happen for him, if he can’t for anyone else.

“There are so many of them,” Wedge says in a cracked voice. “What are we gonna do?”

He makes a decision.

"Got your grappling gun?" Biggs says, as though they’re checking up on gear before a mission. His voice is business-like, even though his throat might tear. 

"Y-Yeah, I do,” Wedge stammers. “But what does that have to do with anything?" 

Biggs pats Wedge's cheek. "I love you, buddy. You get to somewhere safe." 

"What are you talking about-" 

A bellow comes from the stairs. "AVALANCHE, stand down!" 

"Goodbye. I'm so sorry," Biggs says. He pushes Wedge backwards. 

“No! BIGGS!" 

Wedge screams. Biggs glances down and sees a rope flying up, sees Wedge staring at him in horror before he hits the ground. Good. He made the landing.

He catches sight of familiar faces. It's Cloud and Tifa. And another girl... someone he recognises, from Sector 5. Was her name Aerith? The one who used to bring flowers to the orphanage? What's she doing here?

He doesn't have time to contemplate upon it. "'Bout time you got here, merc. Now I gotta do my part to clear the path."

He staggers forwards, gun raised. He knows he isn't going to survive this. But he's still got time to make a difference... 

***

Biggs lies on the floor, one hand gripping the damaged flesh over his ribs. The pain is immeasurable, but it's muted out by a single thought, running through his head over, and over again.

He’ll never get to save the planet for the kids. Instead, countless more will die because of Shinra. 

He failed.

"Biggs!"

He gives a gruff laugh as he sees Cloud's approach. There's shock in those Mako-blue eyes. 

"You made it," he says, and Cloud winces when he hears his voice- it's so hoarse it's barely audible. "Though... I might not."

Cloud looks down.

"Hey," Biggs says, his head jerking up, causing a wave of dizziness to rush over him. "Is Wedge..."

He can't finish the sentence. He pushed Wedge off the pillar to save him, and if even that failed...

"Don't worry," Cloud says. "He'll bounce back."

Biggs grunts in relief. He can hardly breathe, but his muscles relax ever so slightly. "That's... good to hear. Could've used some extra padding myself..."

He breaks into a coughing fit. It feels as though his ribs are scraping against his insides, blood and phlegm rises in his throat. Cloud leans forwards in alarm, gripping his shoulder.

"Don't talk."

Biggs disregards him. He looks up into Cloud's face- it's blurry, he can barely make out his features. "It's... pretty bad up there."

He grips Cloud's hand with as much strength he can muster, and that's not a lot. 

"Cloud, promise me," he says. "Don't let it be for nothing."

His entire fight can't have been for nothing. He promised that he would help people, and now they're all dying around him. It _can't_ be for nothing. He failed, but that doesn't mean Cloud has to. 

Cloud hesitates, and then lifts his other hand to close around Biggs'. "I won't."

He looks so determined. Biggs chuckles. _Who would’ve thought. Turns out SOLDIER boy does care._

"You're a good man," he says. Cloud's face contorts as though he resents the title, but Biggs isn't taking it back. "Giving me that... that comfort."

It's a strange thing, but it does ease the pain, just a bit. Whatever happens up there, he won't have to see it. He can die hoping Cloud will save the day. His hand goes slack and drops to his side, he can't maintain his hold anymore.

But even though he knows his escape is coming, he can't help but think, knows he'll be thinking to to the end, about why he did this in the first place, and how catastrophically he failed.

"One more thing," he says suddenly, desperately, because he's a dying man, and he'll never get to see the kids again, but maybe Cloud can carry out his wish for him... "The Leaf House. It's an oprhanage."

Cloud's eyes darken knowingly, though Biggs doesn't know why.

"In the... Sector 5 slums," Biggs continues. "The kids... they're great. I used to visit-"

He breaks down coughing again. It's even more painful than before, and blood drops splatter against the ground.

Cloud shakes his head slightly. "That, you'll have to do yourself."

"Lemme guess... not a fan of kids." 

"No." 

"But you have... so much in common." He remembers Squall, tough and unforgiving, who refused to let things show, but really had all the love in the world in his heart- he was just afraid to show it. He sees the boy in front of him now, staring down at him as he coughs his life away. And then it's as if all the kids are standing before him, with that same betrayal in their eyes from when he left them the first time, except now he can't make it up to them-

 _I'm sorry,_ he thinks.

It’s too late to cry, too late to feel anything but a grudging sense of closure. This is it. He failed. This is his punishment. Biggs looks up into Cloud’s eyes and nearly smiles, because he sees genuine pain there. He reaches out and holds Cloud's head.

“Good luck, Cloud,” he says. _You’ll need it._ “Our future is in your hands.”

And with that, Biggs dies. In his pain and regret, it’s a relief.

***

_His eyes flicker open, and all he’s aware of is pain. His body is covered from head to toe in bandages. He can't move._

_He’s alive._

_Is it a second chance? Or is it punishment?_

**Author's Note:**

> SPOILERS AGAIN tho if u read this like... it's on you
> 
> thak god biggs is still alive... is it alt.timeline shenanigans or what? either way i'm glad because he got like NO development in this game, which is why i wrote this damn fic in the first place
> 
> biggs' compulsive habit in this is mine, i do the pattern of 1-2-3-4 1-2-3-4 1-2-3-4 usually with tapping wood or my head
> 
> i am so sorry for this rubbish please do not read it and send me hate mail


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